The Horror of the Big Reentry

I wrote with such enthusiasm about my grand plans for the summer in the May 24th blog: Summertime: Ticks, Tricks and Moon over My Hammy http://tinyurl.com/jwfkkux

The four weeks of “vacation” are over and from the adorable snap shots you probably thought it was nothing but a blissful, perfect time. It was great. I am very fortunate. We created wonderful memories.

Someone pour a vodka shot in my eye – or what is more eloquently known as Vodka Eyeballing http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vodka_eyeballing)

vodka in eye

So as I reenter my daily life my blood boils. My three children are hideous, sugar addicted, tired creatures that can’t make a good decision to save their lives.

babysmoking

They are sabotaging me in every way possible. Really, how can I have this much laundry to do? It’s been over five days and yet there are still piles. How can you moan and groan through the healthy dinner I made you eat and ten minutes later announce you are hungry? Why on earth would you stand outside my office doors staring at me while I work?

I am at a breaking point. Sell them? Forget that, it might take too long. I am giving away all three for free and I may offer a pig as dowry.

I can’t help but think of the blog that went viral earlier this year, “Worst end of year Mom ever” http://jenhatmaker.com/blog/2013/05/30/worst-end-of-school-year-mom-ever. An honest assessment of how much one can stand as an adult and as a parent before you are sure the universe is trying to destroy you. And that Mommy blogger is a preacher so I am absolutely permitted to voice my true sentiment about vacation and the aftermath.

mom tied up

I truly feel I am being tarred and feathered. So much so, that I looked up the history of the violent act. Here is what I found:

As the focus of tar and feathers shifted from informers to loyalists, the practice became more violent. In 1775, a physician named Abner Beebe was blistered by the hot tar poured upon him. The mob then “carried [him] to a Hog Sty & rubbed [him] over with Hogs [sic] Dung. They threw the Hog’s Dung in his Face, & rammed some of it down his Throat.”(6) In 1776, a Charleston mob committed a even grizzlier execution.

No wonder I felt a connection!

Folks, it is time to crack the whip and break their spirits. I need normalcy and my sanity back. I demand respect, an organized house, responsibility by all and school to start ASAP. All hail the year round school!

kids on bus

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About alisonguzzio

A marketing and public relations veteran, Alison Guzzio has directed projects for a range of high-tech, pharmaceutical, security, ecommerce, manufacturing, chemical, global trade and broadband companies. Strengths include positioning companies to maximize visibility among key stakeholders such as media, investors, channel partners and customers. Alison has a strong understanding of business objectives and she effectively translates this into results for her clients. In addition to her experience managing the demands on emerging companies, Alison is skilled in taking products from conception to roll-out, developing creative marketing plans, generating media coverage along the entire product lifecycle and leading brand awareness campaigns during critical growth stages.
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